I Hate Running

Best use of a treadmill ever.

I have always been a firm believer that unless something is chasing you, there is no reason to run.

This is not something that started in my sedentary adult years.  I have never liked running.  Even as a kid I would do anything to avoid it.  When I was in track…I did field.

And now I have painted myself into a running corner.  There is this stupid running thing at the end of the triathlon.  I must now make peace with it.

Y’see, I can swim for hours.  No problem.  I can’t do it very fast, but I can do it (kick turns and all).  And I have always been happy to bike anywhere and everywhere.

This makes me an exception to the rules.  Apparently, a lot of people who participate in these insane events are runners who for some reason or another can no longer do marathons or other even more insane races.  The blogs and forums are filled with tips so beginners can learn to swim well enough to make it to the biking.  Then they move on to making it through the bike to the run.  The tone is definitely “don’t worry…you will get past these unfortunate sports and run,  we promise!”


In my quest to finish, I will have to run.  I suppose I could just walk the 5K, but there is no “kick ass-ness” in that.  So run I must.

Every week I walk up to the treadmill.  I stow my towel, my water, and my iPod and prepare for my doom.  No matter what I try:  different music, watching movies on the iPod, books on tape, TV, Buddist meditation, daydreaming, quadratic equations…nothing can take my mind off the fact that I am running.  And I hate running, so you can imagine how I have to drag myself through my 20 minutes here, my half and hour there.

At the paces I am setting now, I might finish the run 2 hours after they have packed everything up to go home.  There will be one guy left at the finish, holding my bike, smoking a cigarette and checking his watch.

3 thoughts on “I Hate Running

  1. I’d never seen the High School recreation of that video. Almost more entertaining than the original.

    Have you seen Ok-Go’s newest video, featuring the Notre Dame University Marching Band?

  2. I think it is better, just because you are routing for them not to make a mistake.
    I guess I should thank Ok-Go for not allowing embedding on their version.

  3. Oh, it’s not OK-Go’s fault they don’t allow embedding. It’s their label’s deal with YouTube, which pays EMI a little money every time their video gets played:

    “The catch: the software that pays out those tiny sums doesn’t pay if a video is embedded. This means our label doesn’t get their hard-won share of the pie if our video is played on your blog, so (surprise, surprise) they won’t let us be on your blog. And, voilá: four years after we posted our first homemade videos to YouTube and they spread across the globe faster than swine flu, making our bassist’s glasses recognizable to 70-year-olds in Wichita and 5-year-olds in Seoul and eventually turning a tidy little profit for EMI, we’re – unbelievably – stuck in the position of arguing with our own label about the merits of having our videos be easily shared. It’s like the world has gone backwards. ”


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