Comings and Goings

Before I begin, I have to get this off my chest:

Shut the f*@k up, Emilio.

There, I feel better.

Another red carpet challenge.  Another “make it for Heidi” challenge.  Yawn.  And so continues the pretty dresses parade.  Note to producers:  YOU SUCK!

ANTHONY came back!!  Of course, this joyous news was predicated by Maya leaving the show.  And in case you missed it she left because she just felt creatively exhausted.  She wasn’t sure she was ready for Bryant Park.  She, well, does it really matter?  She wimped out.  Christian Siriano was younger than Maya, and he managed to find a point of view.  He managed to win the whole damn thing.  One thing you need to learn in this world: if you’re going down, go down swinging.  Wimping out like that just sells yourself short.  And she blew the biggest opportunity she will ever have in the fashion industry.  But on the bright side:

Anthony

Way to come back, girlfriend!!  Even though he stole Mila’s color blocking, even though he only managed one hour of sleep, even though this could have gone horribly, horribly wrong…he pulled it off.  This was my favorite dress.  It moved on the carpet like a dream.  The back is insane…perfect for that “peeking over your shoulder” pose that everyone on the carpet seems to love. The slit in the front kept in young, and Heidi would be the bomb in this.  Of course, Heidi didn’t like it.  So it co-won (a PR FIRST jazz hands) because the guest judge, Jessica Alba, loved it.  The other winner was:

Emilio (I don’t know how to write with scorn, so I just used everything they give me).

No one since Irena has been this annoying.  Granted that was just last season, but who would have thought it even possible, let alone so soon?  I would love to give him the benefit of the doubt and say that they must be editing him that way.  No, actually, I wouldn’t.  He is an ass.  Which, of course, means that he will win the whole show.  Crap.  I hate it when the bad guy wins.  What makes it worse is that he probably deserves it.  This dress was so well constructed they should get this guy to consult on the Panama Canal extension.  There was a weird pucker right where her navel should be.  Could be her navel, I guess…but I’m wandering.  Other than that, it was beautiful.  If anyone other than Emilio had done it, I would be gushy.

Those were the only two that stood out as being good.  The rest follow:

Seth Aaron

I didn’t like this.  It was all the ingredients for edgy, but it looked executed by a third grader.  I think the decision to rusch (don’t know how to spell it, but you know what I mean) the bodice ruined it for me.  It had the look of a badly executed roman shade.  If it had been really sleek, it might have worked better.  But, you can’t do edgy with a regular full skirt and a standard neckline.  However I LOVED the back.  It is almost impossible to see in the pictures, so I won’t post it.  But it was amazing…looked like it belonged to a different dress.  He can do a lot better, and he needs to kick it into gear.

Jay

Well, he took a risk.  I have noted before that women DO NOT LIKE THEIR hips butt thighs etc, to look bigger than they are.  Even though Jay thinks it looks good, women do not.  Since we are the largest dress market, he might want to take that into consideration.  Especially since Heidi made the same comment in the work room.  But who are we to stand in the way of someone’s vision?  He was lucky the bodice was so amazing.  The color choice was wrong for Heidi, and before anyone jumps all over me that short dresses aren’t red carpet I would refer you to the Grammy awards, or the VMA’s.

Mila

Oh snap.  She sucks.  This isn’t red carpet for anything, unless there is a red carpet leading to ladies night.  To call this cocktail would be an understatement.  And what was with the color palette?  Heidi in brown?  What is Mila smoking?  Has anyone not seen this dress before?  I have, in the clearance rack.  The sewing was a joke, the colors some kind of sewage explosion, the cups were too far apart, the straps didn’t hold anything in place, the length was wrong, and the whole thing smacked of ready to wear.  She will be gone next week.

But the aufing went to:

Jonothan

He tried.  The original plan was to do his cut outs, but he made the mistake of choosing drapery material.  When Heidi pointed this out to him, he lost all self confidence and proceeded to flop around the workroom like a fish on a hot pier.  He started working on a new dress, but then didn’t like that one so went ahead and made a third dress.  And he wonders why he ran out of the only fabric Heidi liked.  Another problem was the fabric was jersey.  It is difficult to sew and drape and well, everything.  There was a sense that he had just given up, especially when it was so crazy short.  Another nice back, but there just wasn’t anything else redeeming about this piece.

Five little piggies left.  Just two more people go home before we have the final line up for Bryant Park.  Wouldn’t it be lovely if Anthony could make it?  Nah, I don’t think so either.  It will be the boys:  Jay, Emilio and Seth Aaron.  Jay can’t win because a Jay already won.  Seth Aaron can’t win because he is Jeffery’s Mini Me.  So that leaves Emilio.  I’m starting to feel this is like those fixed Olympic sports.  “Well, she was supposed to win the balance beam, so as long as she doesn’t fall, she’ll win”.  The producers know who they want at Bryant Park, and will do whatever they have to in order to get them there.  Just watch, the last two challenges will be dresses, or challenges where you can do dresses.  Besides, there has never been an African American winner.  But if that is their thinking, could someone put them in charge of Major League Baseball?  I know a really popular team that hasn’t won the championship in a while…