Romper Room on Crack

Late because the Olympics are sucking the life out of me.  I can’t wait for NBC to lose the contract so ESPN can take over and broadcast the games in the spirit of sports, not just marketing.  But that’s a subject for another post…

Ankle biters everywhere.

Now the pretty little dress theme moves to munchkins.  The designers were to make a fashionable, age appropriate outfit (read “dress”) for girls from 4 to 8 years old.  The little ladies were SO CUTE!  But there was the inevitable bitching from the designers about proportion and teeny tiny dress forms.  Jonathan is actually afraid of children.  Don’t let them know you’re afraid Jonathan!!  They can smell fear!!

We had the first impression of the season, with Jonathan’s Michael Kors.  Not bad.  Not bad at all.

Mila is feeling more love in the workroom.  Awww.  Good for her.  She also wins for stupidest sentence of the show:  “If there is a twist in this challenge.”  If…IF!  Oh you poor deluded girl.  There’s always a twist.  Which was, of course, a companion look (yawn).  I would have liked it better if the companion look had been for the little model’s twin brothers.  But alas, if the big models aren’t in the show, then there is no reason to film Models of the Runway.  So we knew the models would show up sooner or later.

The Crier was worried.  Yeah, they showed you crying on the phone to your husband…any personal back story is the kiss of death, sweetie.  Be worried.

Let’s start this parade, shall we?

The Gifted Program:

Capt Jack

Are they serious? This?

Granted, cutest little red jacket EVER!  Can I get one of those?  But what was with the kaddiewompus waistline?  I had an almost irresistable urge to straighten the dress.  Could you imagine feeling that every time you looked at your kid?  Would kinda take the fun out of a day in the city, wouldn’t it?

The real problem is the mom’s outfit.  What’s with the rick rack red piping and the buttons?  And, while it may have seemed the perfect choice, why would you use the same belt that Ben used in his look last challenge?  The colors were dirty and gross, and I wold have NEVER put this in the top three.

But they don’t ask me.

Moving on…

Jay

How adorable is this?!?!?!?!  I love the colors.  They were perfect for the mom who is sick of pink (and they all eventually get sick of pink).  Jay really nailed it:  age appropriateness, silhouette, the kangaroo pocket, everything.  I think the mom’s top could have fit better.  But other than that, this was amazing.

It’s hard to believe that there was a better look.  But there was.  Oh yes, there was.

Seth Aaron

Seth Aaron has been growing on me lately, and these looks are going to help immensely.   It was obvious that he came from a space that included a daughter.  When he mentioned he had made a purse I knew that his model would love it.  I know that mine can’t resist a t shirt with a stupid plastic toy attached to it.  And no self respecting girl could resist a clutch purse.  It’s genetic.

It was sassy without being too mature.  It had layers and interest and would make a little girl feel all grown up.  Loved it.

The best thing about his looks were that that mom would definitely buy that outfit for her imaginary daughter.  But they weren’t clones of each other, like Jay’s was.  I did have an issue with the gun barrel bangs he put on the mom:  no mom has that much time to spend on her hair.  The jacket would now be hanging in my closet if I could figure out how to steal it from the Lifetime studio.  What a collar!  And it fit her like it was made for her…a strange oddity on a show where all the clothes are custom made for the models.

Congratulations, Seth Aaron.

The Remedial Runway:

Jonathan

The designer that is afraid of children made an outfit that would scare children.  Makes sense.

Is the mom shedding her scales, or is it winter dry skin?  Yikes.  The girl’s dress would have been cuter without the bolero, I like the colors and the shape.   However, nothing could make me forgive the “kleenex dispenser” aspect to both pieces.  This is where that editorial eye that Tim Gunn is always going on about would come in handy.

Hard to believe that the outfits get worse, but they do…

Amy

My eyes!

She went big.  She went all the way out on the very skinniest end of the limb.  And as my children would say:  epic fail.

I liked the layering for the girl.  The judges thought it was too much, but my boys have worn more layers than that, so the judges are a little out of touch on that one.  The obvious deal breaker on this one is those pants!  THOSE PANTS.

Comments were mostly about the colorway not working.  Really.  The colors are what bother you about that outfit.  It couldn’t be that she looks like the snakes kids draw in preschool?  It isn’t that the pants stop at the knee, which must be about as comfortable as wearing one of the crotch hemmed dresses?  It isn’t the fact that the “petals”(read scales) actually get smaller as you work down the pants, so that the model looks broad across her abs and HIPPIE?  Or the fact that none of the edges on the pants or the skirt were finished?  Hmm.  Okay.

And the outfit that was actually worse than Amy’s was:

The Crier

As Tim put it, she really rocked Halloween on that one.

It is actually a really cute outfit for a little girl.  Especially girls that are too big for Emilio’s outfit (hello Easter Parade), but not quite ready for the full-on Brittney Spears look.  It was just woefully under designed.  You could easily find these looks at Penny’s, especially the mom look.  Yeesh.  Could she have made a less flattering jacket?

They sure gave her something to cry about.

Note to Producers:

Unless I missed it, I did not hear Tim Gunn say “make it work” this episode.  I bet he copyrighted it and now they have to pay him extra if they use it in the show.  So instead they have decided to include any time he says “circus clothes”.  “Make it work” is much better.  You’re making a fortune off this show.  Pay the man and include the damn catch phrase already.

Note to Designers:

Thank you.  Thank you.  (pants)

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